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Romance, TV-Style

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Time was when the winners of television game shows earned a roomful of furniture, a trip to Tahiti, or, if they were really lucky, a Brand New Car! Today, winners of some such shows earn a spouse. There also was a time when a date consisted of two people and a pizza place or movie theater. Now, dates can consist of 26 singles, a posh estate, and a plethora of TV cameras.

Oh how times have changed!

Reality television shows not only have altered our entertainment choices, but also our thoughts about romantic relationships. And while most of us are aware that shows such as The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, Joe Millionaire, For Love or Money, Blind Date, and ElimiDATE are mainly a form of entertainment, the word reality in this genre can be confusing. Just how much are these programs affecting the way we view romance, dating, love, and marriage?

In search of some answers, we gathered four Christian women from different walks of life to share their take on this new trend.

Why do you think there’s been a surge in relationship-oriented reality TV shows recently?

LaTonya: We live in a tabloid-oriented culture. For example, celebrity couple Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez graced countless magazine covers and even were discussed on serious news shows as we tried to figure out if they were going to get married or not. As a society, we want to watch. We want to see the carnage.

Also, if you’re single, as I am, it’s more difficult to find a dating pool these days. There’s no boy next door I’ve known forever who shares my values, or longtime church friends who will introduce me to quality, compatible single men. Consequently, many singles aren’t in a relationship, even though we really want to be. So some people feel as though they need to go to extreme measures to get into a relationship, such as going on national television.

Carla: Plus, there’s something tantalizing about living vicariously through somebody else’s relationship. I think a lot of people thirst for drama because our lives often feel mundane. So these shows provide something exciting to talk about around the water cooler the next day at work.

As a whole, how are women portrayed on these shows?

Margaret: As objects. In fact, they treat themselves as objects. For example, on the first episode of the most recent The Bachelor series, the producers who chose who would be on the show talked briefly about the women’s intelligence, but they mostly focused on the fact that these women had to have bikini-worthy bodies. Based on previous shows in this series, this should have come as no surprise. They knew that’s what they signed up for. These shows totally objectify women and tell us that what’s valuable about us is our appearance and our sexuality.

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